Sunday, August 12, 2012

Reasons for Health Insurance...

Once upon a time, I got shit-canned and needed to have my annual OBGYN appointment.  Now, really I just needed to renew my prescription.  However, the doctor won't do it if you haven't visited him in a year and/or have paid your dues.  (the insanely expensive office visit, to put your feet in the stirrups (SIDEBAR: which is still more fun than going to the dentist.  I HATE THE DENTIST)).


Soooooo.. I called my doctor, who I really like, and his total office visit was going to cost me $236.00 without insurance.  I don't know about you, but I'd like to not be thrown out of my house, so I think I will pay the mortgage instead.  My back up plan was to call Planned Parenthood to check out the damage there.  Well for a mere $85.00, I could get my prescription.  Perfect.  I made an appointment, thinking it would probably all happen in 10 minutes.  WRONG.  But after talking to Miss Mobster Accountant, I should have hit the county clinic.  Note to self:  I will do that next time.  I am sure it will take me back to my lovely ride on the Greyhound Bus.  Let me give you the quick breakdown.

Reasons Planned Parenthood Kicks Ass:
  1. It's a mile from my house.
  2. It's cheap.
  3. The people watching might be better than the airport.  It's a toss up.
  4. They have prints of Monet in the patient room, for Culture.
  5. They call in your prescription.
Reasons Planned Parenthood Sucks:
  1. I made an appointment and waited an hour to be seen.
  2. The scale is a liar and dates back to prehistoric times before digital scales roamed the earth.
  3. The waiting room has hard metal chairs.
  4. A woman yelled at the employees because SHE forgot her medicaid card.
  5. It makes me thankful for when I did have insurance.

SIDEBAR: I wish I had picked up several flyers about STD's just to send to my friends, and I thought about that after I left, and I have been regretting it ever since.

Regardless, I was the easiest patient they had that day. No live births, no current children, no allergies, no questions.  They were probably like WHOO HOO! 

The End.