2012, The End of the World? or My Bucket List...

Once upon a time, I did see the movie, The Bucket List.  It's a good one, but I am sure like many others, it got my thinking.  I have a bucket list too.  Is it like my neighbor's?  my best friends?  Probably not.  But here goes nothing.

The Diana Bucket List...
(and no bungee jumping isn't on this list.  I am not about to snap my neck!)

1. Been a part of a hockey fight - a good one.
2. Skate backwards like Ms. Chuck Taylor
3. Watch a meteor shower
4. Swim with wild dolphins
5. Visit the Eiffel Tower
6. Watch a lightning storm at sea
7. Walk the stairs to the top of the Statue of Liberty
8. Eat a hot dog on the street in New York 
9. Buy a fake Rolex 
10. Visit the birthplace of my ancestors
11. Go on a midnight walk on the beach
12. Visit Ireland and drink a beer
13. Bench-press my own weight
14. Get scuba certified
15. Visit Australia
16. Take a swamp tour
17. Be in a movie
18. Get flowers for no reason
19. Get in a fight to defend someone's honor
20. Pick up and move to another city just to start over
21. Walk on the Golden Gate Bridge
22. Visit Alcatraz
23. Visit the Biggest Pez store in the world
24. Learn how to ride a motorcycle 
25. Drive a car faster than 100 mph
26. Have my picture in the newspaper
27. Go to Broadway to see a show
28. Visit the Fort Worth arboretum
29. Have dessert at Reunion Tower in Dallas
30. Ride a train so far you get to sleep on the train
31. Eat caviar
32. Ride an elephant
33. Publish my blog and make some cash money
34. Go deep sea fishing
35. Stay the night at a Ritz Carlton
36. Take a helicopter ride
37. Have my portrait painted
38. Learn to juggle
39. Get chosen for jury duty
40. Go to the Opera
41. Have a song dedicated to me at a concert or on the radio
42. Send a message in a bottle
43. See Old Faithful geyser erupt
44. Help solve a crime
45. Take a ballroom dancing class
46. Rent a convertible and drive to a Bed and Breakfast
47. Buy a new couch
48. Eat an entire lobster in Maine
49. Own a pair of real leather pants
50. Have someone make me breakfast in bed, with coffee, and served on a tray!

"I Love When A Plan Comes Together"

Once upon a time I found renewed hope in someone.  Someone I think I know pretty well.  Someone I thought was almost unreachable.  I think even I, the woman who looks at the cup half full had my reservations.  But as I grew to know and care, I could see perhaps there was a heart, deep down inside.  A bruised heart.  I often think that my time and effort is wasted at times, but today I could see it was not.  I gathered with some close friends for my favorite meal of lasagna.  I say that because it truly is my most favorite meal and I generally only get it on my birthday served by my mom.  Ms. Chuck Taylor was in attendance and her very sweet husband, Mr. Level 13. (12 is the highest level, but I think he is certainly a 13, or will be).  She always makes me laugh and I have to say that even in the short time I have known her, I would consider her in the top 5.  It's not easy to break into my top 5.  Many have come and gone.  The story of the top will have to be for another blog.  But you know you will be back to find out...Do it! 

SIDEBAR:  Ms. Chuck Taylor has a creative side to her which I very much enjoy.  Her selection in cards was great, and I have to say, I like tag-teaming with her in laughter over some very small inside joke. 

"num-chuck skills, bow hunting skills, hockey skills, eating cake skills, eating a second piece of cake skills..."

Today I saw that an impression must have been made this past August.  I arrived at the Tiger's house excited because I had a picture sent to my phone and there was a pile of presents.  I know that I am sadly not a kid anymore, but when I see presents, I can't help but get giddy with excitement when I know they are for me.  Earlier this month, I was asked, "well what do you want for Christmas?"  My response was, "you shouldn't have to ask, you should know me well enough to know what I like."  I stick by that statement.  I knew if the Tiger gave it some real thought, he would know that it doesn't ever matter what the gift is, it is all about the thought behind it.  It could be a candy bar, if that candy bar is my favorite kind.  I would be just as happy with that then a diamond bracelet.  Now, don't freak out, I didn't get a diamond bracelet.  I am just making a point. (although, know that I would definitely accept a diamond bracelet regardless).

Now I happen to be a bit of a PEZ collector.  If you know me, you know this is true.  I figure 300+ Pez dispensers makes you a collector.  So he got me the Orange County Chopper Pez set.  Now, I have watched the show, but what I liked best is that he happens to have grown up in Orange County and I love Pez.  Although not a direct correlation, it is one that puts a huge smile on my face. 

Of course, it is all ready sitting on my shelf.  It is totally awesome.  I feel like if you become a Pez dispenser, you have made it.  I wish someone would make a Pez dispenser with me on it.  That would be even better than a bobble head.  I would happily accept both. 

Now he happens to be super easy to shop for, but I think what I enjoy best is when he opens something ridiculous that I have given him, he has a hearty laugh which is my favorite part.  It makes me want to laugh right along side him.  If I can keep him laughing and guessing, I think it might make it worth it. 

Even I need a little hope sometimes...

The End.

Are you born with it?

Webster dictionary defines empathy as:

1 : the imaginative projection of a subjective state into an object so that the object appears to be infused with it

2 : the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner.

 

How can we deal with those born without empathy?  I ask myself this because I know of a person just like this. Even though I am in my early 30's, I don't think I have ever come across such a person.  We will call him Mr. Tiger.  I have heard that perhaps it is a recessive gene, a sleeper gene, that surprises us with it's viciousness. It rears its ugly head by showing no compassion, no guilt, no love.  I have read that only about 4% may be responsible for having no empathy.  Do you know what I am talking about? A class of people we normally think of as criminals is actually quite normal in most respects. They are secretly hidden among us.  Someone without a conscience, without a vital part of what we think of as human.  So again, I question.  Do we learn empathy from our parents, our friends, society?  

 

Perhaps people without empathy can pass as "normal."  Most are seemingly intelligent.  However, to an outsider they should be able to access the emotion.  But, perhaps their processing difficulties and poor communication skills, impedes them to know in the same way what other people with empathy have.   Maybe they are overwhelmed by outside stimuli, they cannot focus on others because they are only focused on themselves.

So I have also learned that people without empathy are characteristically sociopaths.  They are regarded by their lack of emotions.  They are  motivated by other emotions such as fear, envy, anger, sloth, the desire to win. Really, sociopaths feel the same things as the rest of us with the one exception. They cannot love. Sociopathy is characterized by the absence of conscience. They don’t feel guilty about hurting others because they can't empathize.  They can not relate to another in pain. 

 

It's almost unimaginable to me.  I think I am can empathize with people because I don't even think about it.  Perhaps it makes me a good person, or maybe it makes me soft.  Unable to just use people and discard them.  I wanted to be the person who doesn't care.  I do.  I used to want to be that person.  The one that never hurts never feels for someone else.  The person that skips through life.  The conclusion is I know that I know how to care for others.  I am pretty sure the person with no empathy might end up alone.